The Dolls are Alright

Common Courtesies ~ Like Please and Thank You

I know you’ve probably heard already. I think everyone has.

Well, it’s true ~ I was grounded this week.

I know, I know ~ I’m a smart girl ~ I should know better. But I just had to know if I was nominated Prom Queen this year.

Tricia is grounded!

Wanna know how it all started?

You see, we have a rule that at dinnertime, there is no television, no radio, no cell phones and definitely no texting. Dinnertime is family time ~ it’s when we talk about our day, what’s on our minds and connect as a family.

I not only get that, I actually enjoy it. I do have a lot to say.

But this time it just seemed way too important not to bring my cell phone to the table. I wasn’t going to text ~ I was just going to receive a text. Ole Eagle Eyes caught me looking down one too many times and … well, the rest is history. My cell phone was taken away, I was grounded for a week and … yes … more … I had to write about common courtesies.

Actually, writing about common courtesies was the easiest part. It’s something that is just, well, common in our house. We have this posted on our refrigerator:

Life is short,
but there is always time enough for courtesy.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

We were taught to always appreciate each other, that no one is better than anyone else and the way we wanted to be treated is how we are to treat others. That makes sense.

A really long time ago (I think the late 1950s) an author named Emily Post started writing about proper etiquette and manners. She was the go to person. Here’s how common courtesies are described on her website:

Common courtesies are the little gestures that we perform out of respect for others.
They can be as simple as holding open a door or
letting someone go ahead in a long line,
to something as grand as sharing a homemade meal.
Most importantly, they are characterized by a specific awareness of our surroundings
and how our behaviors may affect those around us.
~ Emily Post

When I was really little, I was taught how to use the words “please” and “thank you.” These words are very important. At first, I wasn’t sure why, but as I got older, I realized that by saying them, I’m showing respect and appreciation.

I know I want to be respected and appreciated, so showing respect and appreciation to others just makes the world a better place.

If you light a lamp for someone else,
it will also brighten your path.
~ Buddha

Being grounded isn't too bad from the sun porch

Here’s what I know about common courtesies:

Be respectful;
Appreciate those around you;
Do something without being asked;
Say “please” and “thank you”;
Don’t forget to also say “you’re welcome”;
Hold the door for the person behind you; and
Don’t text when you are with someone.

Sometimes, being kind takes practice. We have to practice other things like the piano or gymnastics. Well, we have to practice common courtesies as well. And, sometimes, we need reminders ~ like getting grounded ~ that respect for the ones you are with is very important.

Please be kind so we can make this world a better place!
Thank you.

Courtesies of a small and trivial character
are the ones which strike deepest
in the grateful and appreciating heart.
~ Henry Clay

May Day ~ International Workers’ Day

picture of the Haymarket Massacre from Wikipedia

In my history class, I was surprised to learn that International Workers’ Day, also known as May Day, actually has its origins here in the United States.

Yeah. I had assumed for a long time that it was a holiday celebrated in communist countries like Cuba or the former Soviet Union.

Boy, was I surprised to learn differently.

It was the very dawning of day
when the term ‘dignity of labor’
meant something.
~ George E. McNeill

Over 100 years ago, workers had 10 to 16 hour workdays in really unsafe conditions right here in America. People died and were seriously injured on the job, which inspired Upton Sinclair to write The Jungle and our very own local hero Jack London to write The Iron Heel.

And, for this, at the end of the week,
he will carry home three dollars to his family,
being his pay at the rate of five cents per hour -
just about his proper share
of the million and three quarters of children
who are now engaged in earning
their livings in the United States.
~ Upton Sinclair

(courtesy of Occuprint)

It’s no wonder that people wanted to shorten the workday, but it wasn’t until the late 1880s that organized labor had enough support to demand an eight-hour workday. Let’s just say the employers weren’t too happy about this.

The Federation of Organized Trades and Labor Unions held a convention in Chicago in 1884 and proclaimed that:

eight hours shall constitute a legal day’s labor
from and after May 1, 1886.

The next year, the FOTLU was backed by other organizations and soon there were about a quarter million workers in the Chicago area supporting the eight-hour workday.

On May 1, 1886, more than 300,000 workers across the U.S. walked off their jobs in the first May Day celebration. With each day, more and more workers walked off their jobs ~ and it was all done peacefully.

Haymarket Martyr's Memorial (courtesy of Occuprint)

Well, that is until May 3, when violence broke out between the police and strikers. It was horrible, with people being killed and wounded. This is now known as the Haymarket Massacre, and every May Day, tens of thousands of activists join together in solidarity.

The day will come when our silence
will be more powerful
than the voices you are throttling today.
~ Haymarket Monument

It’s hard to believe that people were killed so we could have an eight-hour workday and have Saturday included as part of the weekend. It’s pretty easy to take this for granted.

But each year, on May 1st, people come together so we don’t forget how people fought long and hard for the rights we enjoy today. May Day is an official holiday in 66 countries and unofficially celebrated in many more, but rarely recognized in our country.

However, this year, in the wake of Occupy Wall Street and its countless demonstrations by its off-shoots, May Day takes on an added significance as people continue voicing their desire and need for change.

(courtesy of Occuprint)

I know here in Oakland and San Francisco there are many actions scheduled to take place.

The Direct Action Working Group of the New York City General Assembly summed up May Day beautifully:

May Day is a holiday during which no traditional work is done,
and yet is a day explicitly about work.
It’s a day for recognizing that we are all workers,
whether we’re rank-and-file union members,
the precariously employed, students, or stay-at-home parents.
It’s a day to recognize the value of our work,
and the power we have to collectively change our working conditions and our world.
By simply stepping out of the systems of production that confine and alienate us,
we can transform the conditions of society itself.
May 1st is a day to explore the possibility of communities
based on mutual aid rather than exploitation and consumption.
Unlike Christmas, Halloween, Valentine’s Day,
and pretty much every major holiday in the U.S.,
you don’t have to buy anything
and you don’t have to work feverishly in advance to celebrate May Day.
You can make it what you want it to be.
In fact, that’s really the only thing you have to do to celebrate May Day.
It’s a day for and full of human potential.
What will you make of it?
~ Direct Action Working Group of the NYC General Assembly

We cannot forget how much was sacrificed for us.

When an individual is protesting
society’s refusal to acknowledge
his dignity as a human being,
his very act of protest
confers dignity on him.
~ Bayard Rustin